A few weeks back I went to Best Buy to buy ink for my printer. The computer expert of the store was helping me and just by a few off topic questions that I asked him, he opened up and delighted me with a conversation. True conversations are hard to come by. What was so wonderful was that he didn’t just talk about himself, but when he did he was open and wasn’t just trying to paint the prettiest picture of himself; by this I mean he didn’t brag but revealed. The other side of a true conversation is listening to the other person and not dominating the conversation. He was a gentleman and listened. I could have totally missed this encounter by looking at his unconventional appearance (long rocker hair and strange shaving of his facial hair) or by not engaging him beyond the information I needed about printer ink. There are still jewels to be found out there, you just need to know where to look and what tools you need to dig them up.
About a month or more ago I was in Wal-Mart and went through the checkout stand. The gal on the other side scanning my items was heavily tattooed, had very long nails that were decoratively colored. She looked interesting to me, but not the type of girl that I would normally hang out with (I would be too boring for her type!). I started to ask her about some of her tattoos, and she replied to my questions. I mentions something about her nails and said that I was thinking of a question that I probably shouldn’t ask………….she said she knew what it was and that she got along just fine in that department . (*smile*) She also had some amazing old style of pins on her Wal-Mart lanyard and we talked about them, too. I could tell something about her just by observation, she was creative and artistic. So I asked her if she was an artist and her face lit up with a smile. How nice it must have been for someone to see what she was about. Isn’t it interesting how our appearance does speak something about yourself (well, except for my appearance when I get up in the morning, all that says is ugly)!
When we lived in Oregon, and now as we live here in Modesto, we are near a community of Mennonites. Jeff and I had attended a Mennonite church back in 1999 and Jeff graduated from a Mennonite high school, but these people are different. These are Mennonites who practice being separatist. The married women wear a uniform (a modest dress that is the same pattern for each of the women and a bun bonnet on the back of their up do hair style) and they really don’t engage with the people around them. I have talked with two of them here when I was at the grocery store, but they are not easy about their conversation with me.
At our current church, there is a gentleman in our Sunday school class who grew up in one of these Mennonite churches. He actually looks very Amish (he has an Amish beard). I don’t know his age but I would guess early 60’s. He is very warm, friendly and smiles when he talks. Jeff and I were visiting with him after class last Sunday and I asked him about the women I have been seeing. I had been very influenced by their Christian modesty and dedication to dress what they believed. The conversation with the gentleman from church revealed that even amongst these people there is still much controversy over dress. I look at the unity in dress and interpret it as unity in their assembly as well. Once again, you can easily miss something if you only look on the outside.
The bible says that man looks on the outward appearance but that God looks at the heart. We, as people, can easily have a preconceived idea about a person, positive or negative, due to their appearance. We know the old adage don’t judge a book by its cover. May I take the liberty to ask you to take the time to find out what is in the heart of the people you meet and the people you think you already know?
Yes, the people you already know may not be what you think they are or are no longer what they once were. Over the past eight years, I have walked through many trials and much change. My life experiences have greatly changed me. Of course I still have the same personality, but who I am deep inside has grown, and been pruned and will be blossoming until the day I die. I think it is so refreshing for someone to ask what I think or how I view something, with the intent of getting to know me. It really rarely happens; maybe some think that such questions are obtrusive. I like to ask questions of others to know them on the inside.
I would hate to have a wonderfully interesting book in my hand and never read it because I didn’t care for the cover!
