In Reply To A Dear Friend

This in reply to a dear friend's blog:
http://thecorums.blogspot.com

My dear friend, you know who you are, this is for you.

I love your latest blog post, because I see myself in you, my younger self. Your angst was my angst. Your fears and thoughts were my fears and thoughts. I'm proud of your for writing them out and sharing them with the world.

You, my dear, have grown up in a world (and live in it still) of comparison and competition. You know who the key players are and you know who has influenced you. If I could name your social illness I would call it: Social ADD or Look-at-me-iddis! It's like getting the flu, it gets passed around and everyone seems to get it a few times in their life. Let me assure you, strong health people get better and go on with there lives. (smile)

I have good news and bad news. The good news is that there is a cure. The bad news is that the cure is painful, pain that you can endure but painful no doubt. The vehicle of pain and the cure is summed up in a simple word, trials.

You and I have walked through an awful trial at one time. You know how much I suffered and you were there right along side of me to lift me up and help carry me along. It was hard and confusing, but I grew and God used it to refine my character. Since then I have been through numerous trials of various kinds, like James talks about in the Bible. And yes they have tested my faith. But the outcome of many of those trials has been a deeper faith and trust in God and a clearer view of what matters in life.

Decorating is fun. Baking wonderful cookies is a joy. Dressing in style is an amazing feeling. Loosing 10 pounds is a great success. All good things of planet earth. But the problem with all of these wonderful things of earth is that they quickly fade, you can't keep hold of them because they are illusive. So to keep the feeling, or the admiration of others you have to keep preforming. Think Britney Spears, she had to keep doing more sensational stuff to keep the media's attention on her. Once she stopped she has to just live a normal life dealing with the problems of her life, her kids and just normal stuff like laundry. We all live that desire to have attention on a smaller scale. Instead of grabbing for the media's attention we seek approval of people from church, family and friends and people at work. When the new hair style gets old, when the delish cookie is eaten and forgotten and when the new designer color on the wall fades into the background we are back to square one of needing to do something great to get attention and approval. It is all fleeting and you have to chase it to keep up with it. It is so tiring to do.

There is a better way, and you don't do it overnight. Simply put, walking with Jesus is the cure.

If I were to prescribe your first dose of medicine I would have you go to Scripture House and have you buy a copy of "If Only I Had A Green Nose" by Max Lucado. It is a book for kids, but I think it just might be targeted to the parents that read it to their kids.

The second dose of medicine for Social ADD would be to read through all four gospels.

Then pick a few people who love and support you when you are ugly, stinky and have no Pottery Barn within site of your house! This would include your wonderful hubby and your best friend who I think is Michelle. They get you. They love you. They love you for you on the inside and not how well you bake, photograph, or decorate.

Lastly, bake, decorate, photography, write for you! Do what you enjoy and share it with the people who love you for more than what you can bring to the table. Don't worry about the open house, it's a strange local tradition. Not everyone in the world is so HGTV about their own homes. I have met some of these people and I really like them!

Being in your 20's is like unto a caterpillar coming out of it's cocoon. There is stretching, striving and busting open. It is a process that takes time and can look ugly. God is patient with every butterfly that is going through the process, he created it. You are that beautiful butterfly, my dear. You have so much to give to this world and are crazy talented! I see such beauty in you.

Here is a secret in life that few can grasp: It is better to give than to receive. It is a beautiful thing to give a compliment, to pray with a hurting soul, to bring a meal to someone (you know how I feel about that). When you give, you are able to take your eyes off of yourself and your worldly status and join in the joy of life how God intends it to be.

You are on the right path. It is painful stepping away from the norm. The other side is freedom and beauty.

Warning: the struggle last for a life time, but the more you practice the cure the less you are inflected with the illness.

Love to my wonderful friend Jen who was there when I needed her.

Plaph!

A person who has much internal conversations and thoughts has a difficult time keeping it inside because there is just not enough room. Many people can not understand why some people need an outlet for expression. With out expression some of us would shrivel up and die. Listen to what type of music people make and you will know what is going on inside. Jesus tells us that from the over flow of the heart the mouth speaks.

How can a person keep silent when there is so much on the inside dying to get out? What do you say when you are told to not say anything at all? Do you just stop speaking and expressing? Do you crawl into the whole that you want to go and hide in?

Life doesn't always give you roses. Life is good at giving you lemons, sour and bitter. Yeah, making lemon aid is such a good idea.....but what if you have run out of sugar?